I couldnt find myself in the right way,when everyone made judgement on every angle of it as possible. I could barely even make myself a judgement. I'm confused,stucked,narrowed-minded,unconfident,shamed and etc. Every person I've met,I really jealous everything they had. The life they go through,the future they pictured,the confident in them and every way it goes.
I wouldnt find myself wrong when i said the facts what had happened to me,my life,my journey,my experience,my joy,my emotion,my family and my future. I wouldnt even want to be blamed to speaking out the ugly truth. It's the matter in fact,they couldnt accept it as a mistake and turn it all around. I accepted the fact what kind of life i'm having now,journey i'm going through,experience i'm experiencing,emotions i'm feeling. It's all an extraordinary for me as a 20-years-old-going-adult-young-lady. Most of all,I'm been a patient young lady since I was born into this earth.
But,in fact,everything i did and said are all covered story. I felt very miserable. I couldnt speak what's on my mind. All of it,erased in case I'm not being thought as a story teller or a liar. I knew i'm weak,unconfident,unrealistic,very emotional,sensitive,running out of my mind and i'm going to be ended up as a mental patient. All of everything I did,it doesnt go well or it ended up as if i'm giving excuses to get what I wanted.
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