Really really fast and Frust

It's been just a month and 3 days since started this relationship. And what I had been thinking has started. The way the relationship becomes an issue where less messaging started, trust is an issue, jealousy increasing, and maybe argument will start soon.

I guess I had been pampering him already and he started to use this advantage. At the same time, I'm thinking, is he really what worth fighting for? At first when he asked me to be his girlfriend, I already thought it was fast already. Now, it seems like I'm falling down real fast. Faster than he does and he's having the advantage of me fears of losing him than he does.

I really need to slow things down. I really need to stop myself falling fast. But gravity seems to making it work real fast. Just according to my weight and the gravity, it already does it work.

I need focus focus focus. Stop thinking more than just for myself. I'm trying I'm trying. Trying real hard. I woke up already from this reality world