Always alone

Everything I'm going through everyday is all alone even I have a partner...he said he won't leave me alone but it seems it's like another challenges ahead in this relationship.
I see ppl have partners doing things together while me i am just like maybe im in a relationship but for others I'm still single and available...
If its not then they'll say I should be with another guy who deserves it.
I got only 1-2 person to talk with but it seems like every time I want to burst out...I can't find them as they are doing their own thing...
I watched glee today. About long distance relationship, in the end, they didn't work out and they break up too...what a nightmare...
Have partner but always alone...

Heart sour

Every time I only able to see you but couldn't be close to you, be with you, hang around with you, stay with you and etc...my heart feels sour
Who am I really meant to you?

Broken

Don't act strong and happy in front of your school friends...
The most obvious thing is your eyes swollen...let your heart burst out..
I told my mind...I couldn't..because I don't want to burst out here...I wan to burst out only the one I loved

Him

I think he's on drug again. I see myself fear and frighten. I don't want to be in worst nightmare again. His eyes, I can tell that he's on drug...I didn't know how but I felt it...
I don't feel anything good on him anymore.

Don't think you cared

Everyone is selfish for themselves and you too...
I didn't know what makes people treats people unfair since the human is existed in this world...just because of wanted to survive? Why would they do it by cheating and not doing it fair and square. I hate this!
You wouldn't care me, you just care mostly on yourself. I have to stop caring someone else I love.

Stay or leave

At first he said let her give birth and after few months when her emotions are stable enough then only would make everything clear between him and her...
But now it's already going to be 4 months old....till now not even one thing is made clear...
I'm not saying I ain't patient...I did...and I'm getting confused whether he still want me or decided to be with her instead. I really really confused all by myself now..

Curious

When there's something that you ask, question, doubt or suspicious....when you don't get the answer...the feeling is really suffering. No answer to a question, doubting with millions question marks in the head and suspicious but you don't get to see it with your own eyes...
It really hurts and you will never know what will happen next...
During the time you are waiting to know the answer, truth, no doubt....your heart beats really fast...cold sweat....
I hate this feeling...

I couldn't be as cruel as you

I can try to stay away from you but I really didn't know how but I could only try to pull myself back just to give you space for your own.
I can say no but if that's what you are happy with, then I've got no choice but to follow what you wanted and see you happy rather than I'm making myself happy and made you angry with me for what I've chose to do. I'm really really sad to do the things that I make you mad and sad....
I wish you always happy...rather than I happy on my own without you..
I can do it but....I didn't know whether you are willing or you are totally didn't know what I was thinking and what I've chose to fulfil what you needed....

Something special

There is something special that we both still can sparks...just that maybe only one sparks and the other is not, it needs to be repaired.
I can see we still have it. And I think he knew it too.
Time will tell everything.

Hope

Hope I will be better and he too. I really didn't know how to face him. It is truly the closest stranger feeling ever. Not talking, not smiling, not joking, not happy together at all.
I just want to be us again....

Yesterday

While waiting this happens

I don't know how

He said that he's been thinking a lot lately after we arguing. Basically I kept shooting him back every time he ask me question. But I am just jokingly and smiling while answering it. I knew I didn't respect him previously. But I change is because I want to respect people. So others don't feel that I am rude as how he said me.
It's true I am jumping back into this romance. I don't want to have another bad romance. I have too tired enough. Really tired. Sad. Been not sleeping well lately. Wake up and cry. While sleeping I am crying. If it's not, my body will be shaking or shocked once and when I sleep back, my body shocked once again.
I really wanted this and I know that if we both change, it's no longer us anymore.
If I go and find him. I think he would probably piss off already. I really didn't know how because I just want to talk with him regarding on this. My heart just can't stop thinking and my heart hurts.

Whether I'm in a relationship or not

He said he would like to accompany me to visit hospital but not very convincing from the starting.
Guys will always be guys

Inspiration?

Been going through and still being the same that boys arent going to feel that we're unhappy unless maybe we should change roles...
But, even we dont change, if happens that they are going through, they still wont admit that how bad it is to feel unhappy for us.